Tight Fit

A few years back while we were car shopping, we were disappointed with the small trunk offered by the Toyota Avalon. The car critics were unhappy, too:

• The Toyota Avalon is classified as a full-sized sedan, a species currently occupied by such stalwarts as the Ford Crown Victoria and Chevrolet Impala. The Avalon manages to look smaller and sleeker than those slab-sided vehicles, thanks to a crisply creased character line that runs the length of the car and a handsome front fascia that extends to a sculpted hood. Like most big four-doors, the rear overhang seems excessive, especially considering that its trunk volume of 14.4 cu.-ft. is puzzlingly small for this class.

After this story though, we might have to revisit the issue - it must have been visually deceiving:

• Three bound bodies have been found inside the trunk of a car in Chicago's Brighton Park neighborhood on the Southwest Side, authorities said this morning.
  
  The bodies, all adults, were found by police in a Toyota Avalon slightly before 7 a.m. near 48th and South Whipple streets in an industrial area, police said.
  

  The discovery comes a little less than a month after three other bodies, all men, were found in a Pontiac Grand Prix about two miles away in the McKinley Park neighborhood with their hands bound behind their backs.

Fitting three bodies in a trunk is no mean feat. We suggest the detectives begin looking for neighborhood Tetris experts, maybe start searching any nearby Tetris hangouts and Tetris bars. Tetris is a Russian invention, isn't it? Maybe enlist Patrick Daley's help in going through some of the Russian cab stands or vodka bars.

By the way, the Grand Prix has 16 feet of trunk space and the rear seats fold down for more dead body... whoops, we mean cargo space.