Aldercreature Follies

First up, Aldercreature Lona Lane (18th) tries to score brownie points with Aldercreature Tunney (44th) and maybe a bit of political cover for a contract employee's screw-up:

• A Chicago alderman has introduced legislation to create "official placards" that the city's 50 aldermen could place on their vehicle dashboards, but she emphasized it wouldn't be to avoid parking tickets.

  Ald. Lona Lane (18th) said Thursday the measure will be tweaked, but she said she would like some designation for vehicles used by aldermen. She said she would like it to allow her to park on permit-only streets while visiting block clubs.

We're pretty sure there's already a method for non-residents to park on permit-only streets and it's only $10 for a book of them. Surely she doesn't plan on visit block clubs more than once a month or so? If she's going to be that busy, we'd recommend moving the block club meetings to a public venue such as a nearby park or church that has ample parking.

Let's just call this one exactly what it is - more aldercreature bullshit.

And then there's this one:

• The heir apparent to retiring Ald. William J.P. Banks (36th) displayed a Fraternal Order of Police medallion and an FOP membership sticker on his car even though he is not a police officer, in apparent violation of state law.

  John Rice, a top aide and driver to Banks, said he did not know his use of the medallion was inappropriate.

  Shortly after the Tribune contacted him about the issue Wednesday, he removed the medallion from the "JR 10" license plate on his 2009 Lincoln MKS and took off a windshield sticker that read, "Active Member, Fraternal Order of Police, 2008."

So the not-quite-an-aldercreature Rice is already a police impersonator. Nice.

And finally, the drunk alderbitch:

• Ald. Sharon Dixon (24th) was back behind the wheel Thursday evening after a judge ruled her license was improperly suspended when she was arrested for drunken driving in January.

  Dixon allegedly smelled of alcohol and failed sobriety tests after arguing for half an hour with four Chicago police officers on the Far North Side. Her license was suspended when she refused to take a Breathalyzer test.

  But at the end of a four-hour hearing at the Daley Center on Thursday, Judge Eileen O'Neill Burke said one officer's claim that Dixon appeared drunk was undermined by his own testimony that he told her to drive home moments before arresting her.

We were unaware that a suspension for the refusal to take a Breathalyzer test was negated by anything once the word "no" passed the arrestee's lips. Evidently, the fix is already in on this one.